exploring the dark and dank

No, no….the title of this post is not about my colonoscopy and esophogeal scope today.  Let me tell you, interweb friends, git ‘r done…if you need to!  Not a big deal.  Nothin’ to be askeerd of.  Fantastic drugs.  Do it.  Just woke up from the greatest nap EV-AH!  No big problems and nothing that can’t be dealt with.  It was all good in the end.  I’m grateful.
All this scoping has me thinking of dark, dank and tight places….like the cave we have been exploring with our sprouts every summer for about…..the last 20 years or so.  The Texan gets the honor of going in first.  He’s a seasoned caver!  That’s a nice way of saying old.
He has dangled a rope with knots to assist with the cave descent. Yours truly has been down there.  I really have, but this time I wanted to document this for YOU, so I stayed top side.  You’re very, very welcome.  I take my descriptive blogging role incredibly seriously.  Down goes the athletic sprout-in-law.

Be careful.  Don’t slip and fall in the stream!
The brave Sprout is last inside. She hopes the two previous spelunkers will cushion her likely fall.  Smart Sprout.

This is a tight turn the explorers must make.  Pick your poison:  scale the rocks above the swift stream, or resign yourself to wade in the cold water on the bottom.  I think our cavers took the high road.
The Texan proudly poses after making it half way.
Victorious, the Texan emerges from the cave downstream.  It’s quite a climb to get out of there with no help up top!
The Sprout emerges next.  Notice the assistance from up top and from ‘down under’.  Hey, watchit Sprout-in law!
Lastly, the in-law emerges. Everyone is exhausted, slimy and safe. The trek through the cave took about 40 minutes.

Did you enjoy your journey through the cave?  Sometimes dark places are scary, and I prefer keeping my hands over my eyes.  The task is better undertaken with friends who can encourage and help.  You can even fall on them if need be!  When spelunking it is good to:

1.  Be strong and confident.
2.  Have a light to illuminate your way.
3.  Have some friends along.
4.  Be in the presence of your Dad.

Blessings and spelunky love to all this week.

liquid diet weekend

If you recognize the following product,

You are:
1) over 50
2) a gastroenterologist
3) suffer from irritable bowel syndrome
4) a sado-masochist

Well….hel-lo moviprep sexy voice (sounds like what one does before attending the local theatre)….you and I will be on an intimate ‘first-name’ basis this Sunday evening.  Probably whisper sweet nothings deep into the night.  Possibly our relationship will blossom into the wee hours of the a.m.  Don’t you be thinkin’ bout sleepin’……

A friend told me to put a small t.v, a towel, some lanolin wipes, a blanket, and a pillow in my pottical area.  Plan on spending a A LOT of time there.  A scented candle sounds like a good idea….no?  Vodka, too?

I thought I might write about the experience, but I could never top Dave Barry’s description of this procedure.  If I think of anything original, readers of On a Chicken Wing… will be the first to know.  Lucky you!

Worried?  Not too much.  I’m going to have the upper area scoped, as well.  Just want to be sure they disinfect that scope before sliding it down my gullet.  I KNOW where it’s been.  I’m a clean freak like that.  I’ll be sure and mention it to Dr. L.  Bet he’s heard that line before?

Wish me luck.  I’m sure to be at least 5 pounds lighter….yay!

Roxy-Doxy update:  The wiener is recovering from her hernia repair/teeth cleaning.  The vet wants me to brush her teeth.  How does one brush a wiener dog’s teeth, exactly?  OK, OK I’ll try…. as long as I don’t have to floss for her.
She’s been in some pain and I’ve given her the prescribed pain meds.  Made her loopy as hell.  She wants to watch Greta Van Susteren constantly and she pulls up the Greta blog on the computer.  She was in a chat room discussing the Florida preacher burning the Koran.  After chatting for at least 2 hours she turned to me and asked, ‘Who is Core-ann?’  See….see what life is like with this petulant, opinionated sausage-dog?
Here she was taking her Red Cross Lifeguard Test on our recent trip to the mountains.

She wants to work at the Country Club pool next summer.

Have a fantastic weekend.  Eat up!  Indulge in lots of tasty solid food in my honor.  Go ahead…you have my permission.  Love to all.