better than wine

Well…..almost.

The following list contains things/products making my life complete right now. Any of these necessary for you??

1. Over-the-counter pain relievers.

2. Pinot Noir.

3. Miralax.

4. Any wine with the word Bogle on the label.

5. Sleep aids. Am a big fan of 1/2 an Ambien. A wee bit of valium works wonders, as well. Don’t have these prescriptions very often, so I make do with Advil PM, Unisom, Nytol, melatonin, Alteril…..I’ve tried them ALL. Funny…..I’ve never needed a drug aid to make me feel up.

6. Merlot.

7. A functioning ceiling fan to fall asleep (or stay awake…see #5) under.

8. Pinot Grigio.

9. Amazing Concealer.

10. Cabernet.

11. A gifted hair colorist/stylist specializing in gingers.

12. An effective hormone replacement plan (see #7).

13. Funspired. Susan and Farrar are the BEST. They save me from the humiliation of wearing my mom jeans and they introduced me to STACK WINE!

A miracle.
Behold the miracle.

But, do you know what is really floating my boat right now? What I wax rhapsodic about every morning (and some evenings!). It’s a gift my brother/sister-in-law recently introduced to me.

My endless love.
My endless love.

If you guessed a Capresso frothPRO.…..you’d be right! Smarty!

Foamed milk with coffee (Keurig) in the mornings is my latest addiction. I allow myself two huge mugs of java in the a.m. The first one is half-caff and the second is decaf. Limiting caffeine is cleaner. I don’t have to mop up the mess when my heart explodes.

Started foaming the 1% skim milk the Texan and I drink and added it to my cup o’ joe. Good.

Changed to no-fat milk….it makes the stiffest foam. Very good.

One sad day I ran out of milk and scoured my pantry for a can of skimmed milk. WOW-ZAA! The most outstanding, full-bodied foam EV-ER!

On a recent trip, my daughter-in-law introduced me to Coffee Mate’s Bliss.

Aptly named.
Aptly named.

This creamy concoction makes any coffee drink a ‘just died and woke up in heaven’ experience. Bliss+Capresso Foamer=Latte Nirvana

Upon waking, I pad into the kitchen and power up the Keurig. Then, to the fridge to grab the dairy product du jour to whip into an exquisite head of foam. Ah…time to reflect. Life is good. This is the day the Lord has made! After several sips, my guttural grunts and ughs turn into ‘Good morning, sweetheart’. Lucky Texan. Don’t get me wrong….I’m a morning person, but this drink smooths a morning’s rough edges.

These coffee drinks would cost $8 at Starbucks.

No alcohol/drugs are involved.

Yet.

Stop and smell the coffee love to all.

crap shoot

The following post contains disturbing information about make-up. If you are a man, you may wish to stop reading….that is, unless you are familiar with repairing drywall. In that case, please read on.

It’s a battle. I’m fighting with every scraper and paintbrush in my toolbox.

The dilemma?  Trying to convince the make-up I apply in the morning to actually adhere to my FACE. About 2:00 pm the makeup has mysteriously disappeared, or worse, it has cemented itself into the rivulets and grand canyons on the porous landscape of my visage.

Being a fighter and problem-solver by nature, I sought to stop the southward flow of my Estee Lauder. After applying moisturizer in the morning, I follow with this spackle of wrinkle fillers.

blogmove 020a
This is the ‘filler’ that keeps the makeup where it belongs. No more migrating.

Do I look like a martian after applying this green goo? I dunno….it’s supposed to take the ruddy redness out of my skin. After liberally smoothing this product over my face with a small putty knife, it’s time to apply foundation. No taping or sanding required during this step.

Next, I squirt some foundation onto my fingertips along with a blob of the following product.

002a
If the label doesn’t proclaim AMAZING or INDUSTRIAL STRENGTH, I don’t bother.

I want excellent coverage and this keeps me from having to apply a second coat. Kinda serves the same function as KILLZ in covering black mold.

When the wall color is set, I work on the windows (eyes). Apply another eye primer and then the eyeshadow of my choice.

When the walls and windows are all set and smooth, THAT’S when I reach for the face shellac. This is the product to finish things off. Sort of a Gorilla Glue for ladies. The ultimate fixative!

blogmove 019a
Just think of this as hairspray for the face.

That’s my morning drywall ritual. Easy enough (dripping sarcasm).

But, last Monday something went terribly wrong. When I grabbed the shellac and liberally sprayed my face to set the spackle and paint, I choked with the atomic fumes of an exploding navel orange. Seems I had picked up the wrong product. How had this little bottle made it from it’s home on the back of my toilet to my make-up table? (Texan!?….Roxy Doxy?)

Are you familiar with Crap Shooter?

blogmove 018a
Spray in the toilet BEFORE you do the dirty deed. All that is left is the sweet fragrance of orange blossoms!

It’s an outstanding product. But it makes for a pungent and inferno-like facial shellac.

I got extremely lucky this time. Really.

No one mistook my face for a toilet all day.

Thankful love to all.